Insight GloboGym Purple Cobras*

Black

Purple Cobra

“Nobody makes me bleed my own blood!” ©

Tired of the same old you? Tired of being out of shape and out of luck? Tired of being overweight and under-attractive? Hello. I'm White Goodman, Owner, Operator, and Founder of Globo Gym America, and I'm here to tell you that you don't have to be stuck with what ya got. Here at Globo Gym, we understand that "Ugliness" and "Fatness" are genetic disorders, much like baldness or necrophilia, and it's only your fault if you don't hate yourself enough to do something about it. And that's where we come in. Globo Gym employs a highly-trained, quasi-cultural staff of personal alterational specialists. And with our competitively-priced on-site cosmetic surgery, we can turn that Frankenstein you see in the mirror every morning into a Franken-fine! Of course you'll still be you in a legal sense, but think of it as a thinner, more attractive, better you than you could ever become without us. How do I know? Well, I'm not only the founder of Globo Gym. I'm also a client.